Moving, moving, moving = stress, stress, stress was my cry last time I communicated with you a few months ago. How accurate is this statement? Well let me tell you there have been numerous changes to schedule all out of my control, not to mention my whole office being disrupted, packed and repacked. Thank goodness for our paperless society one could say. Of course if you have some technical difficulties, computer crashes, then this can compound issues and presents yet another curve ball!!
This led me to “What is wrong with this picture?”. Maybe entrenched expectations, unrealistic timelines, no system, mindset?
Expectations can lead to frustration and disappointment or we can exercise a little switch in our brain which we can call ‘flexible’, ‘adaptable’, ‘open’, ‘willing’ or even ‘in the moment’. We talk a lot about exercise of the body and associated benefits but what about exercise of the mind?
Do you have entrenched mindset behaviours that don’t serve you well or have you developed some other what we could call emotionally intelligent responses or behaviours?
It is not about merely saying ‘be positive’ it is about raising our awareness with regard to our ‘coping’ behaviours to keep us sane or on an even keel. Do you know that we naturally develop our preferred or habitual responses from a young age and then continue to adapt and mould according to our peer, family and friend associations, work and school?
So how do you adapt or respond to the unexpected? What are your strengths in this area? If you do have some flexible, open to other ideas, collaborative, motivated, optimistic and willing traits then it could be a breeze for you. But what if you are frozen and fearful around risk or changed circumstances. Do you feel helpless and lost without the original plan?
5 tips to help
- Have a grand plan in the first place but also have plan b or even c. This means you have analysed possibilities, used your problem solving skills or involved someone else (collaborated) who is good at risk analysis. This does not mean you have to limit your thinking by the way! You can be an optimist but not blindly, you are ready for the unexpected, the ‘what if’.
- Be confident that changes to plans have good outcomes sometimes even better than expected. Look for the benefits, believe me they are there!
- Relax into the new situation and use a technique such as Edward de Bono’s 6 Thinking Hats to look at all perspectives. Be mindful so you are not immersed in all what can go wrong but what could be right about this.
- Know yourself and keep working on improvements. Consider yourself a work of art that needs some tweaking, finessing, even changing. If you have some habits that don’t serve you well discuss with a friend or colleague to gain another perspective. Commit to making some adjustments. Reflect and learn from past experiences too.
- Or engage a coach, do the Harrison questionnaire as it will definitely help to identify those blind spots and in addition a coach can help with your plan. Address those fears, set yourself free!
In Mike Dooley’s words
“YOU DECIDE + ACTION = NEW NORMAL
REPEAT OFTEN FOR A TOTAL LIFE MAKEOVER”